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Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other, by Osho
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"Hit-and-run" relationships have become common in our society as it has grown more rootless, less tied to traditional family structures, and more accepting of casual sex. But at the same time, there arises an undercurrent of feeling that something is missing-a quality of intimacy.
This quality has very little to do with the physical, though sex is certainly one possible door. Far more important is a willingness to expose our deepest feelings and vulnerabilities, with the trust that the other person will treat them with care. Ultimately, the willingness to take the risk of intimacy has to be grounded in an inner strength that knows that even if the other remains closed, even if that trust is betrayed, we will not suffer any permanent damage.
In this gentle and compassionate guide, Osho takes his readers step-by-step through what makes people afraid of intimacy, how to encounter those fears and go beyond them, and what they can do to nourish themselves and their relationships to support more openness and trust.
OSHO challenges readers to examine and break free of the conditioned belief systems and prejudices that limit their capacity to life in all its richness. He has been described by the Sunday Times of London as one of the "1000 Makers of the 20th Century" and by Sunday Mid-Day (India) as one of the ten people-along with Gandhi, Nehru, and Buddha-who have changed the destiny of India. More than a decade after his death in 1990, the influence of his teachings continues to expand, reaching seekers of all ages in virtually every country of the world.
- Sales Rank: #17861 in Books
- Published on: 2001-12-14
- Released on: 2001-12-14
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.22" h x 13.08" w x 5.45" l, .53 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 192 pages
About the Author
Osho is one of the most provocative and inspiring spiritual teachers of the twentieth century. Known for his revolutionary contribution to the science of inner transformation, the influence of his teachings continues to grow, reaching seekers of all ages in virtually every country of the world. He is the author of many books, including Love, Freedom, Aloneness; The Book of Secrets; and Innocence, Knowledge, and Wonder.
Most helpful customer reviews
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
Thought Provoking
By M. T. Crenshaw
Osho's teachings and philosophy, evident in Intimacy, are full of irreverence, sensitiveness, craziness, paradoxes, common sense and profound wisdom.
Intimacy is not a book about physical intimacy, but a book about emotional intimacy. The book is structured, basically, in chapters that discuss those elements that prevent you from becoming truly intimate with somebody else (the habit of reaction, being stuck on security, shadow-boxing, and being attached to false values), and those that will help you to become intimate (learn to relate without having a relationship, be true to yourself, listen to and accept yourself, trust yourself, learn to be vulnerable, be "selfish", learn the language of silence, and meditate), plus an introduction on what Intimacy is and is not, and a final section devoted to Q&A.
The language of the book is very simple and easy to understand, with a constant use of parables and metaphors. Osho was a lecturer and teacher after all, and his writing is a direct reflection of that, as this book, as others are a transcription of public speeches given by him. On the other hand, he is not a native English, so his English is straight forward and simple, and not the usual cryptic philosophical dry jargon that can drive you nuts.
Intimacy is full of wisdom, good advice and food for thought, which will resonate with you whether you are in a relationship or not, looking for one or not, you are a very social person or a reserved one. Intimacy will especially speak to you if you aren't a traditional person in the way you approach society, family, religion, gender roles and the world in general, but you need of help to clear your mind in periods of emotional distress or confusion, and when you need a wise adviser who is not at hand, or the advice you get doesn't provide you with any answers.
A few things I would like to criticise about Intimacy:
> Osho seems to be carried out by his own discourse, and he becomes repetitive and loopy in many occasions.
> Osho equals self-love with selfishness. Although some of his arguments are terrific and this equation is not straightforward, it is a dangerous association. I wonder whether the use of the word selfish/ness is the result of a linguistic calque from an Hindu word with a different meaning. Still, the identification doesn't work for me. I agree that self-love is a catalyst of change, that you cannot give that you don't have, and that you have to give voluntarily without restrictions. Put your mask first and then help others then (as they say on the safety instructions on a plane) is one thing. And put your mask and help others if you want or feel like it, is a very different one. Being selfish and self-centred, even if it is not in a narcissist way, is a bit unnatural, to me. Sharing is impossible if one is self-centred and selfish.
> Osho's criticism of self-improvement and goal setting. Be content with the present, simple be, do not think about the future and how to change it, do not waste your time on anything that is not this very moment, you are perfect and do not need of any improvement. Be happy being. I believe that living the present and being present are wonderful things, and also that setting goals to be socially praised or get fame is a senseless thing to do. I also believe that setting goals and self-improvement are necessary, and a way of getting rid of the limitations and conditioning that our time, society, family, gender or past negative experiences put on our shoulders. I also believe that self-improvement is done for our own sake, not for the public. My own life experience contradicts Osho's teachings in this regard.
I would not recommend this book, or any of Osho's, to anybody who is very traditional in values and way of living, or anybody who is a very religious person (meaning, very attached to a certain Church or religion with fixed views on God and the spirit). You've been warned. If you do, and become offended, you are the only one to blame.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
OSHO!
By Webert Joseph
Beyond him possibly being a cult leader, you cannot deny the greatness that was Osho's mind. His stories, transcribed from his speeches and Q&A with the people who visited him, are like poetry. So what that he might have been a little off his rocker, a lot of the smartest people were :-) And there's a lot of positive things that you can extract from his books if you can look past the controversy that surrounded him. I usually highlight whatever I like from a book, after awhile I had to be really picky about what I liked the most because Osho shared so much wisdom, I didn't realize how much I was highlighting. Keep in mind that Osho was a Buddhist, so there is a lot of concepts that come from Buddhism in this book, but I feel that it really is appealing for anyone of any religious background to read. I loved this book.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
This book will help me to understand life, the here and now, love and others
By mollyjreader1@Yahoo
Very good insight...some things about God did not quite gel with me...learning to love oneself is very well explained...living in in the here and now is very understandable...giving and receiving is also well explained...how to threat others is another topic I enjoyed...well written...
Trust and love...
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